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Some English Jokes

1.Mr Goldsmith was shopping in an expensive London store.He was talking to a young male shop assistant. "I want someting unusual to give my beautifull eighteen-year-old daughter for her birthd-ay." The young man thought for a second, then said," Here is my phone number, sir!"

2. A famous film star went into a shop in a small town.
>"Haven't I see you some where before?" said the shop assistant.
"In cinema, perhaps?"said the film star with a smile.
>"Maybe. Where do you usually sit?"

3.Dr Findlay was passing one of his patients in the street.
"Hello, Mrs Metron. You haven't visited me for ages.
>"I know, doctor. I've been ill."

4."Doctor, my son have swallowed a bullet."
>"Well, don't point him at me!"

5. "Now, has everyone read the chapter on Lord Nelson for homework?"
>"Yes, sir."
Kevin, in which battle did Lord Nelson die?
>"Er ,his last one, sir?